Working Man

(Ken the chicken man finally found a job.)

Yesterday, I cooked dinner at 6 p.m. I feel sorry for Rice-Boy Larry. I prepare the same meal day in and day out. I throw some rice in a pan along with eggs and curry mix. Then I fry the vittles to perfection using bacon grease. My poor kid must be getting tired of the same old shit. Yet to his credit, he never complains. Good for him.

After that, I sat on the sofa and watched a nasty Japanese program called Ju-On Origins. Trust me. This show will put a real knot in your ass. It's filled with angry ghosts and broken people. You won't be able to take your eyes off the screen. You can find it on Netflix.

I called my mother at 10 p.m. using Facebook Messenger.

She said, "Ken finally got a job."

I said, "He was accepted at Chick-fil-A?"

She nodded. "He's the new team leader. They're paying him fifteen bucks an hour."

"And when does he go back to school?"

"August 22nd." 

"Fifteen an hour for a team leader seems like chump change."

Mom shrugged. "What can you do? But he needs to work. That boy is eating me out of house and home."

"I agree. However, the gas station up the street is paying the same money, and it seems like a lot less stress."

"He likes the grub at Chick-fil-A. And the position comes with a hefty discount on food."

"Well, it's his choice in the end. More power to him."

I finally fell asleep at 11 p.m. while viewing Fox News. Trump got indicted in Georgia on charges of racketeering. Eighteen of his cronies were also charged with the crime. The district attorney of Fulton County in a radical leftist. She ran on the promise of putting Orange Donald through the wringer. Our country is being assaulted by socialist libtards. I fear for our future as a nation.

I woke up at five a.m. and ate two jelly donuts. Then I read the headlines on my smartphone while taking a nasty dump. Several attractive ladies from Seoul put on some skimpy bikinis and rode through the streets of Gangnam on their motor scooters. The government has decided to arrest the girls for indecent exposure. Korea is a very conservative country. A public display of tits and ass is strictly forbidden. 

I woke up Larry at 6:30 a.m. I kept shaking his leg until he eventually opened his eyes.

He said, "What do you want?"

I smiled at him. "I made you breakfast. Bacon and fried rice cake. It's on the kitchen table."

He devoured the food in no time flat, and put the dirty plate in the sink. But I didn't have time to wash it. I'll have to do it when I get home tonight.

I gave my kid a hug. "Try not to act like an asshole today at school."

"I never act bad at school."

"Well, that's up for debate."

Several of my son's teachers say that he talks to much during their classes. Yet I'm much too old to fuss at the child. I simply no longer have the energy to be that type of father.

I ran out the door and made it to the bus stop with two minutes to spare. I feel like I'm in better physical shape since my wife left me.

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