Sharks Swim Forward

 

(Mom is always looking to the future.)

Yesterday, I read the bible. In the gospel of Mark, Jesus talks with the Pharisees about divorce. He says that the Mosaic Laws regarding this practice are weak and outdated. He goes on to assert that the only excuse for dumping your wife is if she’s cheating on you. This is certainly disappointing news for me. I’ve been dreaming of ejecting the Dragon Lady for many years, but Christ’s teaching on the subject matter is pretty plain. With that said, is it OK for an angry woman to treat her husband like an emotional punching bag? Questions, questions. Unfortunately, I have no answers. Life’s certainly not easy.

Later in the evening, I watched the NBA. The Denver Nuggets defeated the Los Angeles Clippers in an exciting game that went into overtime. Nikola Yokic is currently the best player in basketball bar none. He’s a strange combination of Larry Bird and Hakeem Olajuwon. Nikola scored forty points and snagged eighteen rebounds. Plus he had ten assists to garner the triple double. However, I was thoroughly impressed with the Clippers. Don’t overlook them when playoff time rolls around. That team is loaded with talent.

I fell asleep at 10 p.m. and dreamt about my dead father. We were sitting on a deserted beach and eating clams. We didn’t speak to each other. We were too busy stuffing our faces.

The alarm sounded at 6 a.m., and I drank a cup of coffee. Then I walked to the bathroom and read the headlines on my phone while taking a shit. Koreans are making more money these days, but Korea is still one of the most miserable nations in the OECD. On the bright side, it isn't the unhappiest. That distinction goes to Turkey.

I called my mother using Facebook Messenger.

I said, “How’s Nurse Ken?”

She said, “He seems OK. He’s excited about the weekend. Ken’s camping with his friends on Saturday and Sunday.”

“I hope he doesn’t do anything stupid.”

“He’ll be fine. Have faith.”

I smiled and nodded. “You’re right. I need more faith.” I changed the subject. “So is there anything new in your life?”

“I’m thinking about selling my house.”

“Selling the house? Are you crazy? You just moved there six months ago!”

“I know, but they’re building some beautiful homes right down the road. You should see them. They’re fantastic.”

I sighed to signal my displeasure. “I don’t think it’s a good idea. You recently had a stroke, and moving is a huge stress on the brain.”

“You’re probably right. I should go ahead and cool my engines for now.”

Mom is one of those ladies who likes to flip houses. She buys and sells them for a profit. She’s made a lot of money doing this. In fact, the old lady is a millionaire. Don’t get me wrong. She doesn’t have that type of cash in her purse. In fact, she probably doesn’t have enough in her wallet to purchase a pizza. Yet her properties are worth a fortune.

I said, “Have you thought about finding a new hobby?”

“No. I'm real estate all the way. I've never lost money in the market.”

“But buying houses might end up killing you. Maybe you should collect coins instead.”

“What about you? Are you still writing?”

“Yes, but with no success. I currently have a blog.”

“Do a lot of people read it?”

I shook my head forlornly. “Only a few fuckheads and retards.”

“Don’t quit. It might pick up in the future.”

Mom’s optimism can often be contagious. The woman is like a shark. She’s always swimming forward.