No Time for Rest

(I've got no time to even sip a beer.)

Yesterday, I got a ride home from one of my co-workers. He saw me at the bus stop and showed some mercy by giving me a lift. And I was thankful for the help. He saved me a dollar on the fare.

He said, "Where's your car?"

"My wife has it."

"And what has she been up to these days?"

"She found a job in another city. It looks like we are going to have a long-distance relationship."

"Does her new gig pay well?"

I shrugged. "About the same as me."

He nodded in approval. "That's pretty sweet. Soon, you'll be a rich man."

I shot him a glowing smile and gave him the thumbs up. I do this to everybody that I work with for the most part. Sometimes, I tell the truth to the PE teacher. His name is Richard Hurtz, and he's an Ivy-League giant. Not his brain, but his body. The dude is almost seven-feet tall. However, I lie to the rest of my peers. I figure that my personal life is none of their business, and I don't want them to use the information against me in the future. I'm a suspicious motherfucker.

I walked through the door at 6 p.m. and discovered a load of dirty dishes in the sink. So I went to my son's door and started knocking loudly against the wood.

He said, "What's the problem?"

I said, "What's the problem? Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Did I do something wrong?"

"I've been working all day to put food in your mouth as you sit on your ass playing computer games. What? It would have killed you to clean up a little?"

"Sorry. I'll do it now."

"Don't bother. I've got it this time. But start showing a little gumption in the future."

"OK. Gotcha."

I love my boy dearly. Yet he can be a bit of an asshole from time to time. Teenagers are hellions. Especially the males. If Larry had been born a female, my apartment would probably be spotless. But I don't blame him. Most people with dicks tend to live like pigs. It's kind of natural.

However, I had more to do than just the dishes. I also had to fold and put away the laundry. Then it was time to make supper. I fried some rice and smothered it in spicy curry. I also heated up six biscuits in the air fryer. We ate three of them apiece.

Later that evening, Rice-Boy downloaded an app on my phone which allows me to see when my bus will arrive. This, of course, is a huge help. I don't mind public transportation. It seems like a positive to me. I no longer have to pay for insurance or diesel.  In fact, the majority of my transportation needs are met for less than a hundred dollars a month.

I eventually went to bed at 9 p.m. and slept like the dead. Then I woke up at 5 a.m. and drank a cup of coffee while puffing on a Marlboro Red. After that, I read the headlines on my smartphone as I took a nasty dump. A huge typhoon is expected to slam into Korea this Thursday. It's going to travel up the peninsula all the way to the north. So if you don't hear from me, it's probably because I got washed away during the storm.

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