Yesterday, I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Then I read the headlines on my smartphone while taking a nasty shit. The Gagnam area of Seoul is the most expensive part of the city. That’s where all the rich fat cats live. Anyway, a girl in middle school was filmed running through this exclusive neighborhood in fear for her life at midnight. She was being chased by her angry father. When pops caught up to her, he gave the child a sound thrashing. To make matters worse, his wife and son also beat the kid with their fists and feet. And what was her crime? She had refused to sign a medical release form. In Korea, it used to be legal to knock the crap out of your children. Now, however, it’s strictly prohibited. Consequently, pops is behind bars awaiting his eventual release. He’s no longer allowed to speak to his daughter.
I ate hash browns for breakfast as I watched the news on the
world on YouTube. The English actor Ray Stevenson died at the age of
fifty-eight. He was one of the stars of the hit series Rome which was
featured on HBO back in the early 2000s. He also played a homicidal homosexual
in the show Dexter. I was a huge fan of Mr. Stevenson. He was everything
that I want to be. Huge. Handsome. Rich. Talented. Popular. Unfortunately, I’m
just a broke dead dick who lives in South Korea. But unlike Ray, I can still
breathe the air while jerking off in the shower. As you can see, I try to
remain optimistic no matter what life throws in my direction. And why not? Things
could always be worse. I’m just thankful that I wasn’t born in Djibouti.
I called my mother using Facebook Messenger.
I said, “Anything new happening in your life?”
She said, “I’m still begging Nurse Ken to cut my grass.”
I said, “Is he working today?”
“No, he’s upstairs studying for the HESI Exam.”
“What time is it over there?”
“Almost six p.m. He said that he’ll be down shortly. The
grass is getting really long.”
“I’m sorry that he’s such a son of a bitch. I didn’t raise
him that way.”
“He’s not a son of a bitch. He’s just got things on his
mind. I told him I’d do the front lawn. All he has to cut is the backyard.”
I sighed heavily. “Are you crazy? You had a stroke recently.
You shouldn’t be pushing on a lawnmower in the Texas heat.”
“Bullshit. The doctor says I need exercise. I’m too fat
according to him.”
“He probably meant going on short walks and stuff like that.
If you stroke out while performing arduous labor, my name will be mud. Sis will
blame your death on my son, and she’ll never let me live it down. So please for
the sake of God stay away from that lawnmower.”
“You care too much what other people think.”
I nodded. “It’s important to me.”
She finally agreed to my demands. Good for her. It really
lowered my blood pressure.
My day at work went well. I’m currently reading a short story with my high schoolers called Under the Lion’s Paw. It’s about rich people taking advantage of the poor and profiting unjustly off their labor. The guy who wrote it was a bit of a communist. Or so it would seem. But I agree to a point with the author’s thesis. The wealthy are always screwing the working class up the ass. That’s how they make their money.
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You need to pay bail to that father, fly him to Texas, have him encourage your son to help out with chores.
ReplyDeleteFunny comment. No kidding. It made me laugh.
DeleteLOL to that comment on the girls father. Your dilemma with Nurse Ken is that he's now a legally full grown man. He's living under his grandmother's roof, room and board probably paid by your recovering mother. Ken should be waiting on her, hand and foot, for whatever she deems needs to be done. And you get that, but Ken doesn't. There's a lot of ways to skin a cat, and sometimes, like the father/daughter story, physical punishment is the quickest, if somewhat painful, technique to accomplish the task. My son recently commented that he finally understood the wisdom behind the logic as to why I was so hard on him when he was younger. His ability to work hard, and be self-starter, is years ahead of his peers. So, now, I just have to fix my other children the same way.LOL
ReplyDeleteYes, he certainly needs to help out more often. But the kid's under a lot of stress. His big test is Thursday, so things should settle down after that. I should have beat him more as a child, but it's not in my nature.
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